Female Pickup Artists, Huh???

At first, this was unbelievable to me.

I was perusing vice.com when I came across this article titled This Is What a ‘Female Pickup Artist’ Seminar Is Actually Like.

Whoa whoa whoa, stop the clock.

The title stopped me in my tracks. Let’s think about this – female pickup artists. For those that aren’t in the know, the pickup artist, or PUA, is a term that’s been around for decades, spawning communities all over the world of men teaching one another how to meet, attract, and date women. This came to my attention years ago when I read The Game, by Neil Strauss. An entertaining read, the book chronicles Neil’s journey from being a man who had zero skills with women to becoming one of the top PUA’s in the world through his indoctrination into the ways of the pickup community. Personally, I found much of Neil’s views and opinions to be useful about men and women, while scoffing at some of the more cheesy, canned tips he offered.

But female PUAs, really???

The hetero-world of dating centers around the notion that sexual choice lies in the hands of women. This is why clubs allow women to get in for free with minimal waiting while the line is full of dudes, why women’s OKCupid inboxes are full of messages, and why every guy swipes right for every girl on Tinder (or at least I would think so). The thought that women have trouble meeting men is beyond me, and to go even further the fact that female PUAs even exist at all with seminars full of women looking for help is quite confounding.

But then I remembered an important fact – I’m just a man, and men don’t know shit about women.

I never thought women had difficulty meeting men, but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. The overall social awkwardness of the general population seems to be growing- we’re so used to substituting Facebook and Instagram Likes for actual face-to-face conversation. It’s no wonder women and men alike are finding it increasingly difficult to meet each other in social settings. Dating isn’t done the way mom and dad used to do it- the manuscript must be revised and rewritten for today’s landscape.

In my opinion, if there’s any benefit to these female pickup artist seminars it’s this- women can learn about themselves. Reading The Game actually brought to light a lot of my own personal tendencies and self-opinions- I believe  the increased level of self-awareness ultimately helped my cause. We are all on the same boat, trying to navigate the sometimes treacherous waters of modern dating. No one is impervious to a little guidance and self-evaluation along the way.

With that said, do your thing ladies. Cheers to female PUAs, I guess.

– Chris.


  1. Huh! That’s interesting. I guess as a so called alpha female it was never a problem for me. I usually picked my men and asked them out. I have always been very aggressive. It has scared a few off but I am married now so it doesn’t matter! I have been one helluva wingman for many a guy and girl friend over the years since tho. I have never been one to shy away from conversation, and I think that is at least 75% of the battle in the dating world.

    Liked by 1 person

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