Summertime Beach Bodies Part 3

Wait, did I say the goal was to lose 10 pounds? What was I thinking?

Actually, things are going well on the fitness front. I feel like I’m increasing my strength and muscle mass, which must be, definitely be, the reason why I’m not losing weight at a high rate.

Four weeks ago, I said set out a goal to get to 155 pounds by August. I wanted to lose the relationship weight I had gained over the past two years, and at the time I figured a simple target weight would be appropriate for my goals.

We’re only human, aren’t we? Sometimes, we’ll look back at the things we’ve said and the goals we want accomplished and realize that our perspectives change and evolve.

I know, it really sounds like I’m pussying out right now.

But let me finish. After four weeks – three serious weeks, really – I feel considerably better. I’m exercising more diligently and I’m approaching my diet with greater discipline.

By the way, I stepped on the scale this morning at clocked in at 159 pounds, so I am losing weight, motherfucker.

Today’s world is pretty much devoid of patience.

Does anyone know how to wait for things they want? Clearly, not many of us.

I have friends that will text a girl only to check their phones five, six times within a span of ten minutes, checking to see if she’s texted them back.

When we finish a season of Game of Thrones, we are full of indignant rage because we have to wait a year to find out what happens next (I think his eyes turned purple).

Which brings me to weight loss and fitness. If we’ve unlocked the technology to watch every episode of every TV show ever made, then how come there isn’t a magic pill that gets us ripped within a week’s time?

Where would the fun in that be?

Yes, there have been days when I didn’t want to work out, and there have been moments along the way when I wanted to go total #carblife, but overall I’m having an enjoyable experience. Not only do I feel better physically, I feel much better mentally. I am learning about the joys of a gradual crescendo.

Be diligent, persistent, and wait for the rewards to come in time. This can really be applied to almost anything in our lives.

Hopefully I won’t fall off the wagon, especially after talking all this shit. But this chocolate and peanut butter cake that Emily baked the other day that’s sitting in our fridge is really fucking with me.

Chocolate and Peanut Butter Cake

A badass chocolate peanut butter cake.

– Chris.



Summertime Beach Bodies Part 2

Has it really been two weeks already since I made my declaration to get in shape?


The Fourth of July weekend pretty much derailed my fitness plan.

Here’s something I realized – having Independence Day on a Saturday is amazing. It pretty much stretches out the holiday into a two-day debauchery-fest. Well, at least that was the case for Emily and me. Two days of sun bathing and barbecuing by day and forcing my liver to put in overtime by night set my fitness goals back a bit.

But that’s the price I have to pay. I knew that going in. We all have dietary vices: fried foods, chocolate, ice cream, etc. Mine happens to be alcohol. Not that I’m an alcoholic – I’m incapable anyway since I have the tolerance of a 100-pound girl.

Come to think of it, Emily is like 100 pounds but she has the tolerance of a 300-pound Irishman. Guess we know who does the driving home.

Fear not, all is not lost.

I stepped on the scale this morning and it read 162 pounds.

So I managed to have a great weekend and still lose weight. That’s what we call winning.

In all honesty, apart from this past weekend, I have been eating well and exercising. This new diet is making me feel much better, and by much better I mean constantly hungry.

All jokes aside, my body feels cleaner and I feel less sluggish. I am getting closer to entering a greater state of Ketosis. For those that aren’t in the know, that’s when the body burns fat for fuel.

I admit, this weight loss goal is kind of stupid. People want to get in shape all the time and as a result they tell their friends that they want to lose weight. In reality, what they mean is they want to lose the fat while keeping the muscle. I mean, that’s what we’re all going for, isn’t it?

What I’m saying is that the important thing is body composition, not weight. I’m going to keep monitoring the weight weekly, but it’s not going to be the end-all-be-all of my fitness progression.

Simply put, my plan is to minimize my carbohydrate intake while upping my fat and protein intake, all portion-controlled, of course. While at the gym, I’m going to spend less time doing cardio and more time weight training.

I feel a little bad for Emily since my diet affects her diet. This low-carb approach can be a rough deal at times. Try telling two Asians not to eat rice.

Asians without rice = unhappy people.

Asians without rice = unhappy people.

I set a goal for myself and I will continue pursuing it. This is a good challenge for me, and overall I am enjoying the process. I feel better already and I’m looking forward to seeing more positive gains.

But let’s see if I can make it through this weekend without falling off the wagon again.

– Chris

Summertime Beach Bodies

The June Solstice occurred this past Sunday, signaling summer’s official arrival.

What does this mean? It’s time to hit the beach.

It’s time for my pale-yellow skin to get some sun so that it can turn golden brown (maybe more like orange-brown). It’s time to take full advantage of the beaches that LA and Orange County have to offer.

Actually, the beaches here are not that great. They are dirty. The water’s cold. And there are way too many people out here. That Baywatch is full of shit.

Also, I have a bit too much pale-yellow skin on my body at the moment.


Most of us experienced Freshman 15. We go off to college and find ourselves in full control of our dietary habits for the first time, and what do we encounter? Buffet-style cafeteria food. Back in my freshman year, nutrition was not at the forefront of society’s consciousness like it is today. Carbs wasn’t a bad word, and shoving copious amounts of protein down our throats was reserved for weightlifters.

I sure miss my eighteen-year-old metabolism. Eating pizza and chili dogs at 2 AM was no problem at all. Now, if I eat a piece of bread after 10, my ass will be jiggling for a week and I’ll be gassy as hell when I go to work the next day. It’s okay though, I’m a professional crop-duster.


Emily and I have been living together for a little over 8 months now, and I’ve experienced another similar phenomenon – Relationship 15. Full disclosure – my diet as a single bachelor was bland and boring – Chipotle salads, teriyaki chicken bowls, and cereal. If my diet were a person, he would’ve been every character ever played by Ben Stein (Bueller… Bueller). But it got the job done, I was able to maintain a healthy weight this way.

Now that Emily’s around, she’s been cooking some great meals – pasta, stir fry, Asian noodle dishes, etc. They taste great and all, but damn I don’t remember these pants ever being this tight. I didn’t notice until a few months ago when I hit the scale and it read 170. Holy shit – I am going through my fat-Elvis phase. Given that I’m 5’9″, this means I am technically nearing the overweight category.

It was also hard to notice because Emily never gains weight. She’s an ectomorph – she can shit off pounds without having to do cardio. I am more of a mesomorph, which means that while she’s freaking out over gaining one pound, I’ll be sitting over here marveling at how I managed to gain fifteen pounds since we moved in together.

I guess the beers and sodas aren’t helping either.


Needless to say, beach season is not off to an ideal start.

Part of me is saying that I shouldn’t care at all about this weight gain. I can still fit in all my clothes, even though it’s getting a more snug by the day. I mean, who do I need to impress, anyway? We need to learn to love ourselves and feel proud of our bodies no matter what, right?

Fuuuuuck that.

The great thing about fitness and getting in shape is how poignant of a metaphor it is for life. What we get is what we put in. No pain, no gain. No shortcuts. Personally, being content at 170 pounds would feel like settling for less. I’m looking at getting into shape as a good challenge of discipline and willpower. If we push ourselves, I think we’d be surprised at how much we can accomplish, not only in fitness, but life in general.

It’s good to have goals, specific ones at that. We can all sit around and say we want to lose weight and get in shape, but what does that mean exactly? Setting targets and specific marks will sharpen our direction and give us greater drive.

With that said, I’m going to shoot for a weight of 155 by August. Hopefully, my body shape will resemble more like a yellow Mike & Ike and less like a Lemondrop.

Feel free to share any summer fitness goals. Writing them down and sharing them with the world will give you greater motivation to do the damn thing.

– Chris.